Posts Tagged ‘life’

Hey everyone,

2015 is slowly coming to an end (where has the year gone?). In January I promised you to take you onto a little journey throughout the year and give you some updates. My new year resolution was “to work on – and live dreams”. As you may have seen in my little updates I did both of it! Beside some minor setbacks it was one of the best years I remember! It´s crazy how goals can motivate you to go for things or even take you to unexpected chances.

I have to confess that I didn´t made everything of my list happen but hey, there´s a new year! 😉 It worked so well that I decided to give the resolution an encore with the things that are left over and some new goals. J All in all, realizing stuff step by step and get some unexpected addition made me a definitely more positive person again that just wants to start over.

Here are a few examples of my highlights:

  • I really made it to go to London, finally! It was a huge wish on my bucket list + I went there by Eurostar, a thing I really wanted to try even though it also scared me at the same time. In the end it was nothing to scare for at all and I had a wonderful time in this beautiful city!
  • I had this really unexpected experience with my local radio station. You have to know that I was always interested in the “behind the scenes” stuff of a radio station and the job there but I never thought to have the chance to ask an insider about it. This year I had, out of the blue and the lovely reporter told much more right away than I´ve ever asked. It was absolutely interesting and I had a fabulous day!
  • I´ve been to quiet a lot concerts of my favorite artist and had the chance to meet her back. This never gets old and each time so special to me! If you read my previous posts you may remember a part of why she is so important to me.
  • I´ve seen a person back I haven´t seen for years, which was just an amazing feeling!
  • The “secret project” I started with a year ago turns out better and better, which really makes me happy!

Those are my absolute highlights but okay, I want to be fair, of course there have been also bad moments. I had to decline a wonderful job opportunity just because the daily ride would have been way too long. When I sent my application I thought they would be looking for a department closer to me but everything happens for a reason, even if we can´t see it right away, doesn´t it? Also I´ve messed up a situation with a guy by my own stupidity (and fear – if the signs haven´t been all in my mind anyway…) and there´s no chance to set it right. Probably I will regret the “what if” forever but well… I will take it as a lesson because that´s all I can do… Nevertheless, I want to keep focusing to work on and live more dreams in 2016. It seriously made the year so worthy to me! Some of them will become really tough to realize but I´d be happy to share this new chapter with you!

“I wanna take this chance and do something I´ve never tried
I want to make this moment matter till the end of time”
~ Take this chance – Anastacia ~



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Hey everyone,

I have something on my mind that I just need to write down and share here. A while ago I saw a documentary about the stars which didn´t let me go since that day. They explained how stars are born, live and die and so how our Galaxy works and that one day it will die as well. I think it´s a sad thought that what developed in millions of years will end one day but it´s the natural circle of birth and death in a hardly for us to imagine large dimension. What brought us life – the sun – will destroy the earth and moon in approximately 7 Billion years because also the sun is “just” a star and can´t live forever.

But enough about the sad part. They also told about wonderful things. Did you know that everything we find here on earth can also be found in the Universe? You find oxygen, hydrogen, dust but also gold, silver, copper and so much more out there, which is also the prove that our earth is born by the Universe. Stars are a mix of the first 3 (put in a simple term). Their lives last about millions of years. When their light hits the earth, it already travelled years of light speed until it reached us. Even when the star died years ago already, it´s light can still guide us through the night. I think this thought is truly beautiful and also it can help us to remind ourselves in our daily rush that the way we look on time is a relative thing. Maybe you will take a moment and look up to the sky or just remember about the thought of the stars next time when you feel stressed because your schedule is way too busy. I´m sure it will help you to take a deep breath and relax.

Also we should remember more often that we all carry the “seeds of stars” in us. We´re born by the Universe as they are. The earth and each living form here is made of the same dust, the same oxygen, etc. as the stars are. I think in the end we´re all meant to shine. Some of us a little brighter but don´t worry if you might not feel like one of them. Also the tiniest stars brighten the night and for sure the life of a specific someone. With that thought I ask myself even more why humans fight against each other, why they destroy this planet and why it´s hard to just accept each other and each other’s opinion. We´re all made of the same star seeds. Maybe we should remember more often.

Last but not least I want to tell all of you – don´t ever dim your light, you are made to shine in your own way because that is what we´re meant to be by the Universe. Never forget about that!

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Hey everyone,

I don´t know how far the news went around the world that last week a drag queen one the Eurovision Song Contest. It´s open song contest for whole Europe. To be honest I think that the past years it´s less about the music and more an open ranking of which countries like each other the most by giving the highest points. It´s an open secret so to say. This year it went –in my personal opinion – even a step further. Some of you probably heard on the news that it´s illegal to be homosexual in Russia. It´s not that they “just” become discriminated, no, they even can be sent to jail if they show their love open in public. Personally I think that this is kind of sick. I am heterosexual myself but whoever has the right to tell someone who they are allowed to love or not?

The Russian government explains their decision that it would be against the normal nature and some kind of illness to love the same sex or feel born in the wrong gender. If you followed some biology classes it can be explained why some people feel born in the wrong body, just by the way.

“It´s not about loving a man or a woman, it´s about loving a person.”

I am not sure where I once read this quote but it´s absolutely true. In the end we just don´t fall for someone attractive, there´s way more about it. If we truly love a person, we love them for all that they are, with all their flaws, mistakes, for their big heart, humor, attitude, just everything. That they´re are attractive to us is just some bonus, so does it really matter in the end if you like your own or the opposite sex? I think in the end it´s just the heart that matters.

So I think the current winner of the ESC is more a political statement against the Russian government, to show that Europe stands united against homophobia. I truly hope for all the ones that still have to hide their love, that this little step will sooner or later change their surrounding for the better and that it´s maybe for the whole world a step against homophobia and for love.

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Hey everyone,

I think it´s time for a little update. Last time I told that I may let you know about my journey. Well, it seems like things of at least one of my Nemesises are moving forward. I went to the pre-appointment in between and got a date in a few weeks. Call be crazy but I´m absolutely proud of myself to have done those first steps. I sure will have some kind of panic attack the day I have to go there but I am more than focused to face it and do a move in the right direction! (If anyone of you have similar experiences, feel free to let me know btw :)) Will keep you updated on that!

Today I also want to write about another someday someday maybe (I stole the title from Lauren Grahams same titled book btw, which is awesome! If you don´t know it yet, go and get it. 🙂 Well, let´s talk about the things you want to do someday. Someday, when you have more time, someday when you have less liabilities, when the moment is just better than now… but what, if this moment will never be? I think we all have dreams of what we want to do in life. Traveling the world, creating an own home or maybe something simple like learning an instrument or starting with dancing classes for example. Some things are of course easier to do than others but don´t you know that slight feeling, this little doubting voice inside yourself asking what if someday will never going to happen?

I have to admit that I live with this thought maybe a bit more than others and yes, it does scare me. The thought that I might could leave this world without any of my wishes and goals to have come true gives me a sad and anxious feeling. The reason why I am writing this today is that a friend of mine, who´s only 24 lost an old schoolmate at the same age, what I think is really awful! Like singer Melanie Thornton said (ironically a few days before her plane crashed and she died at the age of only 34 as well as singer Anastacia after her first won battle against breast cancer) is, that no one of us is promised tomorrow and we should make each count and meaningful. Due to personal reasons I think about those words every time I think about my dreams and sometimes also in between. Even if it sounds depressive at first sight, it helps me to work on my dreams. About two years ago I started a Netherlands class for example I wanted to do for so long already and I still love it! Also I fulfilled myself a few tiny other wishes and I don´t regret anything! The only thing I regret is the things I haven´t done and that can´t be done anymore. There´s still the list with the bigger wishes that can´t be done that easily but I am working on that!

2014 is the year of “the firsts”

This year I had an intensive thought what my new year resolution would be, because I hate that common stuff that no one keeps anyway. *lol* So I decided that it would be the year of the firsts, which simply means that I try to do things I never done like this before, which also includes to fear this Nemesis stuff from my previous post. But it´s not just negative, also things that I never tried before, like going to places I never went and meeting people I never seen in person before. It´s an exciting journey that makes me nervous at one point and happy at the other. Please push your thumbs that everything works out about it. I´d really would love to make those experiences!

Don´t forget to ask yourself what your dreams are and were you able to live them yet?

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Hey everyone,

I know that I didn´t publish anything new in while but lately I´ve been thinking about some stuff again. As the title already reveals, it´s about a personal respect zone everybody has, that should be –respected-. I think we all agree on that but why is it that this zone doesn´t work in some situations? I´m not talking about that you maybe take a step too close to a co-worker while having a fun time or giving someone you like (and you don´t know if he/she likes you back) a maybe too early hug. I´m speaking about strangers to you – you perhaps have the feeling you know at least until a certain degree – through the media!

It´s not that I know what I will write here only from TV, I´ve also seen those situations myself and were pretty shocked at times. Let me tell you about a concert of a female singer (I won´t mention names here) where an adult guy (about 45) started yelling “I love you, I just want to hug you”, etc. up on stage. The singer reacted cool, went up to him, got down on her knees and said “so give me a hug”, what was really cute in my eyes. Well, he did, that strong and that long (still yelling some stuff at her) that she spread her arms to keep in balance on her knees and just wait it out. A few other fans were literally shocked. Thankfully she´s professional enough to manage it with a laugh and a joke.
Another situation was about a male singer surrounded by a bunch of kids and teenagers that barely let him walk a step, partly pulling on his shirt and stuff. Even the security didn´t do anything about it,  no matter that it was more than obvious that he didn´t seem happy.
A third situation (yes, I´m going to concerts a lot) was a girl around 20 I remember that wanted a photo with the lead singer of my favorite band but didn´t speak English. I just heard in German “what is –I want a photo-?” and so told her. Well, in the end she went up to him, not even saying hi, just placing herself beside him saying “photo”, no thanks right after, nothing; she just went away.

According to those 3 situations, vicarious for a lot of others for sure, I ask myself what happens to some people´s behavior when they meet celebs and why? Why seem the border of respect you normally have for persons around you in life not to work for the once we know from the media?

I think the answer is to find in a psychological trait. All those open media sources connote us that we have a view in a part of what they do and who they are. No matter if it is an article in some magazine, a show on TV or some portals on the internet, we mostly get a lot of news about their lives including relationship, split ups, family or health issues. It kinda makes us feel that we –know- them at least for a bit (regardless if all the reports are true).
Some of them also keep in touch with their fans over social networks but let´s keep it real, if someone with 100.000 + followers answers you at a time it doesn´t mean they know who you are.

In my opinion exactly there´s the problem. When you finally meet them in person, you remember all the stuff you know about them, you maybe remember a virtual interaction and the positive feelings they gave you through what they do. Now you want to tell them, so you maybe grab their arm, scream something or whatever to get their attention. But remember, if you weren´t that lucky to have some real longer meetings before so they recognize you; you´re a stranger to them! You maybe say now that they´re used to it and it´s their job. But it´s not. Their job is to entertain the audience, no matter if actor, singer or author. It does not mean that they give away all their rights of a personal life, what should always be respected as well as themselves as a person.

So ask yourself: How you would feel if some stranger to you “touches you all over” to exaggerate a bit or screams right into your face. Ask yourself how you would feel if they break into your comfort zone in a ruthless way. Ask yourself if you´d keep that person in mind in a good way or at all because others will do the same. And lastly ask yourself: Wouldn´t it be nicer to have a normal little normal talk with them instead? I think this would stay in their mind far more positive, don´t you think?


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“Love is most powerful emotion and the strongest feeling a human being can feel.“

In fact, this sentence which already a lot of philosophers wrote poems about or a lot of musicians sing wonderful songs with deep going lyrics about, is also proven by a lot of actions in reality, in a positive as well as in a negative manner. Sadly the media seems to tell more and more often the stories of jealous men for example that killed their girlfriends because she fell out of love. On the other hand love is able to cross any bridges and distances, thinking of the couples that found there partner in a totally different kind of the world including a different culture and maybe also religion. Nevertheless a lot of these couples find a solution to combine their very different kind of lifestyles because the love for each other is stronger than any space; spoken physically and emotionally.

But what is love? What is this big emotion that seems to get best as well as the worst out of people?  Is it this huge unknown of the universe? Or is it, like the neuroscience tells a simple hormone reaction? I´m not sure about it myself and so writing this is also for a trip on a road that I don´t know where it will lead me.

An inevitable matter of fact is that we choose our partners subconscious by anthropologic parameters. It is indisputable that if we meet someone for the first time our immune system checks out by getting subconscious the pheromones of our opposite, if (s)he´d might be the right one to have children with. It´s an evolutionary process we can´t control. If this matches (and some other parameters) our brain starts to produce more happy hormones like Dopamin, testosterone (for men), Oxytocin (mostly women) but also the stress hormone Cortisol – that just by the way – to increase the feeling to be in love or commonly described as the typical “butterflies”.

So if love is measurable by parameters, is it in the end as logical as 2 + 2 = 4?

According to what we learned above your answer is may yes now but on the other hand there are some irrational tests that prove how partners can be “connected” with each other, even about distances, which just isn´t explainable with hormones. Remember the often heard story about women that felt that there partner or another beloved family member was having an accident somewhere.  They instinctively felt that something was wrong or even woke up at night knowing that something happened. Another interesting test that took place at a university in Australia consisted couples that where placed with a test at different corners of a room without any eye or body contact. Anyway there heartbeats and breath frequency resembled to each other (mostly the women resembled to the men). It seemed like there were feeling their partners which can´t be explained with any common “love hormone” yet.

Also remember that love can grow during the time. What may have begun as a flirt some years back can become a serious relationship or even marriage through the years.  When the first “blind sight” is gone, couples mostly describe their relationship as even more conversant.

“Love can´t exist without trust, respect, interest in each other and communication”

This is a fact that psychologists as well as the majority of us agree on and is also officially known as the four basic pillars.

So what is love in the end?  Is it the anthropologic process that wins the race? Or is it the psychological aspect because we´ve already learned from life that there´s no harvest without care and work. Or maybe all those theories are wrong and it´s just that great feeling that can be hardly described in words because beside all the science there´s still some magic in this world.

I can´t give you the final conclusion. Personally I think it´s a healthy mix of all of those elements because look around you. Life isn´t just black in white in general, it´s the mixing colors we enjoy. Why should it be any different with one of the most beautiful things on earth?


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Do you remember your childhood when your parents were your biggest role models? Your Dad maybe was like Superman, caring about the family, taking all those complicated decisions, while your Mom was Wonderwoman, that eased all your pain and sorrows. If you had a good childhood, you didn´t have a doubt in your parents, no matter which decision they took, you somehow knew that it was always right for you.

As you grow older, this picture probably started to change. You developed your own opinion on things that not always agreed with your parents. Also you made own experiences and learned to understand that daily business isn´t that easy for Mom and Dad as well as it seemed sometime earlier. The image of the superheroes cracked and evolutionally it´s a normal, good and necessary thing. It means that children start to build an own character, are able to take own choices – no matter if they´re wrong or right.

By that time a lot of us start to find new role models and idols. It maybe is the older brother / sister or even a celebrity. Either way it´s someone who is strong and going his or her own way in our eyes. The funny thing about it is that we want to be like them as we wanted to be like our parents in our childhood. Remember all those “family” games you played with your friends, where you were the Mom or Dad. I guess nearly every one of us did. Later you preferred more to be like your older sibling or the already mentioned star. You maybe dreamed about being gifted with a singing or acting talent, being successful and independent or just about having a driving license and to be allowed to come and go whenever you want.

As we reach the adulthood ourselves a lot of people mostly loose those thoughts about idols and role models, because we somehow made it to go our own way but subconsciously there´s still someone like that for sure. Maybe it´s your parents again that still live in a happy marriage or have a save retirement after long years of work. Maybe it´s your Mom that raised you well all alone. Maybe it´s a friend that got up onto her feet again after a bad divorce or a neighbour that found a good job after years of searching. Maybe it´s also a celeb again that won the battle against a disease you also are / were affected with and encourages people not to give up now. Whoever it is, I think it´s important to have those role models and idols at any point of your life. They can encourage us to get to new levels where the road all alone would be a hard one. They can motivate us to try something new and experience things we wouldn´t dare without a little push. Maybe they can also give us the strength to take action when it´s necessary.

So, no matter how old you are or who your idol is, be thankful for them because they can give you the strength to go on in difficult situations and develop yourself where you might thought that you´re stuck at a certain point.

When love picked you up, carried you through the storm

It´s in that very moment when a hero is born

(Steve Holy)

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